Preface
Adults who experienced psychological / emotional abuse during childhood often do not know the fact that they were abused victims. It may experience intermittent or chronic anxiety, depression, poisoning and other mental health problems and often struggle to form healthy attachments / relationships. A report of emotional abuse received by an adult survivor in early childhood may be motivated by skepticism, explicit distrust, accusation of the victims, and even silence and indifference. Adult survivors are seeking treatment. Many adult survivors are often mentally emotionally abused as a result of wanting to maintain a connection with perpetrators who are or are part of the survivors' original nuclear families There. In this article, we explore the behavior related to psychological mental abuse of children. Indications of signs and symptoms presented by children and adult survivors as a result of this specific abuse; recommendations on possible paths of healing.
Hidden wounds of psychological / emotional abuse
Adult survivors are often unaware that they are actually victims of abuse and therefore can not seek help or treatment for invisible psychological and emotional injuries, so experience in early childhood Psychological / emotional abuse is potential. When healthy mental and psychological function is compromised, such adults have various mood disorders, addictive behavior, and other maladaptive ways around the world, potential injury spirit.
This type of abuse, In cases of repetitive and / or chronic Children result in love, empathy, attention, respect, respect, hurt, unconsciously believe that they are worthless. Abused children believe that they feel distorted to themselves and others, often believe they are something wrong at unconscious level and believe that they must be abused. Such children are usually striving to be accepted and approved by others, throughout their lives. It is worthy of love. Survivors of adults who have suffered child abuse are often negligent, abusive relationships, despite the best intention to find happiness and love, because there is little self-esteem. There is the possibility of abusing their children without being conscious of the fact that they are engaged in vulnerable behavior similar to infecting children.
If an adult survivor is seeking help from a spiritual heath expert like a psychotherapist authorized for any reason, it may be necessary to have psychoeducational education necessary as they want to recover from the abuses experienced You may not get targeted assistance young. This is especially true when childhood wounds are left unrecognized and clients and / or therapists unconsciously sympathize with the patient to prevent the occurrence of painful substances during the session , The therapist has his / her own scratch). The success of treatment and recovery from this particular form of child abuse is particularly challenging in that adult survivors under treatment may continue to experience mental / emotional abuse.
According to Andrew Vachss, a lawyer who dedicated his life to defend the child, child's spiritual / spiritual abuse is "the most popular and least understood thing in child abuse." "The pain of people who experienced mental abuse is often trivial and victims of physical or sexual abuse need both time and professional treatment to heal, but like cancer It has the most deadly job internally and there is a possibility of metastasis if it is untreated like cancer "( You treat yourself in your heart, A. Vachss).
Abuse of power
Experts still do not agree that behavior causes child's psychological / emotional abuse, but it is generally accepted by researchers that such abuse detracts from the psychological and emotional growth and development of children . A person with power, authority and / or privilege in a child's life, including parents' children, brothers, relatives, colleagues, teachers, ministers, leaders of scouts, coaches, judicial officials, social welfare workers , There is a possibility of abusing a child potentially The words "repeat", "chronic", "sustainable", "systematic" are important with respect to child's psychological spiritual abuse . This behavior, Continuous breaking force Repetitive abuse in children's lives forms a child's unconscious story that explains the truth of the person they are at the most basic and basic level and the children believe that they are "bad" Because it will be 39; invalid, flawed, hurt, undesirable, and it will not work.
Examples of this type of abuse of parents to children include children being denounced, shameless, being released, being insulted by the public and at home, explaining the child negatively to others, including the presence of children . Always cause problems with children. Make children feel unrealistic expectations. Wording to a child and / or other person is a child's obvious hatred and / or hatred. It is emotionally closed and not supported. Threaten children. The following is a list that highlights additional acts directed towards children that could lead to impairment of mental emotional function, which may include words, actions, complete indifference, and / or ignorance .
- Child abandonment (physical and / or emotional)
- Including words of abuse (including calling a child "fool", "dam", "idiot", "worthless")
- Feel intentionally fear / scare children
- Ironically, criticize, offend; I ridicule my children or insult them, "It's a joke" or "You are too sensitive" / "There is no sense of humor"
- & Gaslighting & # 39; Liar, distorting reality
- Excessive performance demands (such as "you need to make straight A, always, or nothing else" etc.)
- Children's shooting / presentation for presenting natural behaviors (including spontaneous and emotionally honest expression, play, laughter, age-appropriate body exploration, masturbation, for example)
- Do not refrain from attaching / refrain from basic physical training and touch
- Punish your child violently or secretly to show positive self esteem (eg "Do not be filled with yourself, no one like idiots", "The world pegs you,
- Punish children violently or secretly to develop healthy attachments (eg "You are more fond of your friends than me")
- Wrap a child in such a way as to cause a ridicule from a friend and / or in such a way that the child experiences shame and humiliation
- Exposing children to traumatic / violent family scenes
- When chronically stressing and exposing to a vulnerable environment (eg alcoholism, drug addiction, domestic abuse etc.)
- Unconsciousness or incompetence that can not provide pure breeding and affection on a daily basis
- I only meet basic physical needs. I do not want to train and comfort children (eg ignorant emotional needs, ashamed of children to have emotional needs)
- Failed to provide children's growth-sensory environment, neglect to support the growth of children's growth, support
- Make a child an emotional "spouse" / partner (common after divorce)
- Parenting & # 39; Children: letting children do inappropriate parenting jobs and allowing them to become children
- Child's expectations / requests satisfy the emotional needs of the primary caregiver (in the opposite case)
- Social isolation: Child isolation from colleagues
- Bullying (psychological domination)
Why does it happen?
Psychological psychological abuse is caused by many of the same dynamics that cause all kinds of child abuse. When abused by parents / primary carers, we may unconsciously repeat multi-generation abuse patterns. In other words, it is the same malfunctioning action for the child displayed by their parents against them. Furthermore, the stressor of everyday life accumulating with the passage of time may cause parents to complain their own dissatisfaction with their children. In particular, if a child is adding to the sense that life is chaotic, uncontrollable, unmanageable, they may feel that they have control. Social and economic pressure. Lack of parental education. An addictive process occurring in the family (alcohol, drug use, rejection, activation, code dependency). Undiagnosed / diagnosed mental and / or emotional illnesses; a society of little use for recognizing, recognizing and stopping child abuse - all of these factors further contribute to child abuse There is likely to be. In addition, the false beliefs about effective and healthy child rearing technology can lead to abuse of their children. In some rare and tragic cases, parents can really enjoy sitting towards children and enjoy painfully giving pain to the vulnerable spirit of their dependent children. In general, those who are being abused often enjoy the feeling of "controlling" and make it a goal to reward children easily.
Recognize signs
Strangely, despite the epidemic of psychological emotional child abuse worldwide, there are few well-validated ways to measure non-physical child abuse and its impact on survivors. Clinicians often use a revised version of the Child Abuse and Injury Scale (CATS) with several abilities to measure psychological and mental abuse. Child behavior and personality often provides clues to these observers with discreet and trained qualifications that these types of abuse symptoms are obvious. For such behavior and character display,
- Remarkably immature or more mature behavior compared to the age of the child
- Dramatic, sometimes a sudden change in behavior
- Continue seeking attention and affection. Attach to attachments
- Active, non-cooperative, fighting behavior
- Bed wetting / loss of intestinal control (after the child has been trained in the toilet)
- Depression and / or anxiety are often expressed as physical disorders such as digestive disorders, migraine, eating disorders, addictive / compulsive behavior in children. Also, social withdrawal, anger, aggression, distantness and sorrow
- Relationship with colleagues has been compromised
- Lack of confidence / self-esteem
- Given the age of the child, the atypical fear (such as fear of the dark, single fear, fear of certain things, fear of death etc)
- I can not express emotionally & amp; flat & emotion. Flat & # 39; Impact (ie lack of proper facial expression). It may be impossible to respond appropriately to general social cues. It may interfere with the development of emotional bonds
Impact on adult survivors
Abuses experienced in early childhood may adversely affect adult survivors throughout their lifetime unless quiet damage to the heart, soul and heart is not recognized and cured without treatment. If survivors of abusing parents are trying to cope with abuse it is typical to deny that their parents abuse occurred. To avoid trusting the truth explanation of child abuse actually occurred or survivors of adults, accusing the child of any negative behavior that the parent indicated to the parent towards the child Is common. Parents are often adult survivors, parents who are listening to other families, such as adult children constantly "worrying", "angry", "not forgiving", etc. Protect the public image of. Such deliberate aggressive tactics are in the form of simple mental emotional abuse not recognized by the parent, already suffering with mental and emotional symptoms as already listed Possible below:
- depression
- Anxiety
- Active or passive suicide ideation
- Misuse of alcohol and drugs often leads to poisoning
- Eating disorder
- panic disorder
- Obsessive-compulsive
- Agoraphobia
- It is difficult to form meaningful, rewarding, reliable intimate relationships
- Self-destructive, self-destructive behavior (which may include Borderline Personality Disorder type symptoms)
- Abuse acts on themselves and others, including their own children
Cure: recognition is the first step
Adults who believe they may be affected by child abuse are professionally trained therapists who support recovery from psychological and mental disorders peculiar to children's mental and emotional abuse It is encouraged to ask for help. Adult survivors engaged in psychotherapy typically experience emotions such as refusal, anger, negotiation, depression, anger, acceptance, sorrow, and so forth, as the veil of protection illusion rises, previously being suppressed dark Exposing adult survivors to ugly truth. Treatment also results in adult survivors becoming meaningful and emotional with self and other people, because child abuse often results in a child being separated from the most truthful and authentic part of herself It is a means to put the risk of connecting in an honest way. The therapist will also help guide adult survivors in connection with discussing abuse with others. Whether it leads to an abusive family. I will explain how to manage the interactions with abusive people who chose not to disconnect.
In addition to skillful therapy, online groups Adult survivors of child abuse Especially useful for providing additional support, education, and resources while going through an intensive core process process. healing. Books such as books Children of adults who are abused: healing programs for people who are physically, sexually, or mentally abused And The body holds the score: the brain, the mind, and the body to the healing of trauma You can also provide valuable information on healing from all forms of child abuse, such as a clever body / mind therapy style Hakomi therapy .
What can you do to help the affected child?
Child abuse Any It is the observer's responsibility to report concerns to the local Child Protection Agency if it is suspected of parents. It is the agency's job to investigate abuse reports, including essentially non-physical abuse. Psychological psychological abuse is typically defined by an institution such as abuse that allows a child to fall into a situation where sustained psychological / mental injuries that children suffer in the area of growth and psychological development and function . For details on how to report child abuse and how you report suspicion, see the Child Welfare Information Gateway website.
Conclusion
As shown here, the results experienced by the victims of psychological / emotional child abuse are potentially unable to calculate. However, research in this particular field has been relatively dilute to date. According to studies done so far, children may experience lifelong patterns of discontinuation, depression, anxiety, dysfunction / toxicity. Relationships, low self-esteem, accessibility to experience empathy, etc. The development process may be disabled or even interrupted due to insufficient mental and emotional adjustment. When a child enters adolescence, they often feel that it is difficult to trust, so that you will experience satisfaction and happiness in interpersonal relationships without knowing the root of misfortune, dissatisfaction, pain as adults There are things that I can not do. It should be found in their painful, wounded childhood. Sadly, when parents become parents, adult survivors may be very difficult to respond appropriately to their needs emotionally and deal with it Own Thereby perpetuating the cycle of multi-generation abuse that exists within the family system.
Alice Miller, the author of the revolutionary book, Talented children's drama: seeking true self "Pain is the way to the truth, can not be loved as a child, can heal the pain, but you do not have your own truth, and throughout your life you will heal the pain (A. Miller, The Roots Of Violence) Ultimately, in order to cure invisible wounds of any form of child abuse, adult survivors You must bravely acknowledge even the most painful and incomprehensible truth. Therefore, the decision to be held responsible for your own happiness and healing is actually the most courageous act. Perhaps what we can possibly contribute to the continued abuse of children through individuality and what we are willingly doing with collecting to change this, not being loved.
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