You live in Maine, but the 88 and 90 year old parents live in Florida. If you are the oldest or only occasionally adult, you are the designated care giver. How do you manage it?
It would be difficult if you like most of us. Three years in Shreveport, Louisiana I was responsible for mother care, but I was too persistent and less fit. instead
Just going there alone, I found a source of many help. And on the way, I learned an important lesson.
Lessons learned:
I learned to appreciate all the things my mother did to make his work easier, organizing her thesis and saving enough money for myself. I learned to appreciate my college friends who offered my home and spare cars when I visited.
I learned to appreciate the network of friends of Brunswick and Shreveport. I took him to dinner. While laughing, I insisted on long walks and going to the movies. I thanked my best friend who brought clothes, soap, shampoo and sandwiches on a long day and a night two and a half months after my mother died.
But while she died, while I was back in Maine, I often fell, she told me that her treatment was offending her, or she was bothered from 3 to I got five phone calls.
Sometimes what I wanted was to throw my hand into desperation. Instead, I was trained on active listening, so I was able to listen to empathy for all telephone complaints and learn to respond appropriately. By doing so, I learned that I have compassion for this powerful independent woman, my mother, and now those who need my support. I learned to ask God's guidance so that I can offer it.
It is important to plan and organize after many misunderstandings, and it has been found that there are times when it is always wrong to try it.
Survival kit:
1. Please take time to check your parents. We are strengthening the power of health care of the living guidance and lawyer documents. Consider using the booklet of The Five Wishes available online or at a local hospital. This guide will help you express ways your parents would like to borrow, if you can not speak for severe illness or for yourself. It is unique among all other life motivation and health surrogate forms, to address all needs, ie medical, personal, emotional and spiritual needs.
2. Specify the place to handle the document at your home. You may want to purchase a special desk and a small filing cabinet to use for that purpose.
3. Your parents can create at least 20 official copies of your power of attorney as lawyers will not have copies of their homes in court.
4. Invest in a fax machine. In addition to your phone and email account, it is very valuable to respond to doctors, accountants, hospitals, Medicare, insurance companies, pharmacies, banks.
5. Use online banking. Set this with your parents Before your parents become incompetent, they may need to answer questions or give permission on your behalf. This saves time and energy as well as postage.
Please find a way for your parents to spend money. My mother's assisted life
I opened a small bank account for her. This is something I have to ask for. The facility did not do it automatically.
7. Maintain role loading of important phone numbers related to the affairs of your parents. Please enter the names of physical therapists, nurses, doctors, financial advisers, lawyers, insurance agents, cabinet ministers and friends. Do the same thing as your email address book on your email site.
8. Collect important documents such as will, power of attorney, life trust, life testament, insurance policy, bank litigation, tax statement, etc. in a takeaway file box. Many of these original forms will probably be put in your parents' safety box. Hometown bank. Accurate records will help avoid later conflicts.
9. Place the key in the safety deposit box, you can easily find it. You may want to place this envelope on the front of the carry all file box, put in a large bright red, orange, or shocking pink envelope. Lost your key is easy if you dislike your emotions when your loved one becomes seriously ill.
10. Visit frequently as time and money allows. It is equally important for financial, legal and medical health to protect not only important to your parents but also mental and physical health. When a doctor, a nurse, or a lawyer sees what you are attentive it is unlikely that you will slip things.
11. Massage is beneficial for people in assisted living and nursing homes. Set up a regular reservation for a therapist to visit. My mother was not usually a kind and kind person, I loved it! When touching, do not forget yourself. My massage therapist at Brunswick has become a comfortable healing source in the last 3 years! People Plus also offers healing touch and other body therapies when comfortable care is required at a small fee.
12. Ask for help. Make friends with your parents & # 39; Keep in touch with your friends. Please consult the state senior experts where they live. Laws vary from state to state. If you have brothers and sisters, please find a way they can help, even if you buy and select seasonal gifts. If your work looks too overwhelming, or if you are lonely or confused about how to help desperate parents who are hurting your health, join the Caregiver Support Group. You will be satisfied and thank you for the fact that your parents did you!
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