I was first exposed to the concept of personality disorder when I was trained as a therapist at the San Diego Children's Emergency Medical Center in 1980. hospital. DSM - III just came out, and on the second axis of the five diagnostic categories, the therapist needed to diagnose the presence or absence of personality disorder. (The current DSM-IV uses the same approach.) I work on Axis I's problems (eg depression, substance abuse), treatment that is not under personality disorder.
A few years as a family lawyer, I have witnessed the same underlying problem in a family court case that is frequently violently contested, but it has not been diagnosed yet and is misunderstood. People with personality disorders generally see relationships from a strict and hostile perspective, so it is inevitable that the majority will fall into the hostile process of the court. As more flexible and cost conscious people today solve divorce, brokerage, attorney assistance negotiations, or just that, cases remaining in litigation can increase due to personality disorder.
Nature of personality disorder
A person with personality disorder is usually a person experiencing chronic internal distress (for example, fear of abandon) causing self-nuisance (for example, looking for a person who fears abandonment). Abandonment) - in work or in life. They may work very well in one configuration, but experience confusion and other repetition problems. They do not change with anyone else, they exist as very attractive and intelligent people. But usually, after you have spent time together or watched on crisis until the fundamental pain reaches the surface.
The need for interpersonal distress, fear of abandonment, and excessive management is a notable symptom of personality disorder, placing a heavy burden on marriage. Consequently, the Impernet dispute eventually occurs in marriage, conflict handling becomes a very dispute process. People with personality disorder become very disturbing, in contrast to those who simply distract from divorce (over 80% recovering after 2 years). It is a long term of dysfunction (adolescence or early adulthood) that meets personality disability standards.
Typically, they developed their personality style as an infant abuse, abandonment or abandonment, an emotionally lacking household, or simply as a way to deal with their biological predisposition. This personality style may have been effective adaptation in "family origin", but it is counterproductive in adulthood. People are repeating a narrow range of interpersonal behaviors to avoid this pain.
Personality disorders usually do not disappear, except for corrective ongoing relationships such as years in counseling relationships. Until then, we may always seek correctional experiences through a series of unsatisfactory relationships, children's courts, and court proceedings. In a sense, untrained personality disorders never disappear, only changing the venue.
Personality disorder appearing in family court
Perhaps the most common personality disorder in family courts is borderline personality disorder (BPD), more commonly seen in women. BPD may be characterized by violent anger even for a wide mood swing, benign event, idealization (such as spouse or lawyer), underestimation (spouse or lawyer, etc.).
Also, there is generally a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). There is a big forward in ourselves by excluding others. This is a vulnerable type that may be similar to BPD and it can cause distorted perception of intense anger (eg domestic violence or homicide, eg Betty Broderick's San Diego incident). Or it may be an invincible type, which is separated and believes that he is very good and can automatically receive special handling.
The Histrionic Personality Disorder has also appeared in family courts and may be similar to BPD, but less anger or confusion. Antisocial personality disorders do not include extreme ignoring of social rules and almost empathy. (The majority of the prison population may have antisocial personality disorders).
Dependency personality disorder is common but usually familiar with helplessness and passivity and is not almost aggressive at trial, but sometimes he often marries more aggressive spouse.
Misidentified as cognitive distortion
Because of the history of pain, people with personality disorders recognize the world as a much more threatening place than most people. Therefore, their perception of other people's behavior is often distorted and, in some cases, delusive. Because their worldview is generally hostile, in many cases all people are considered either ally or enemies. Their thoughts are often governed by cognitive distortions such as all-or-nothing thinking, emotional reasoning, personalization of benign events, maximization and minimization of negative. They may form very inaccurate beliefs about others, but strictly adhere to beliefs when challenged - challenging is usually recognized as a threat.
People with personality disabilities are more likely to make false statements. Because of the personality disorder thought process, one more experiences interpersonal refusal or conflict than most people. After that, a person is very difficult to heal, staying in the refusal phase, depression phase, or anger of sorrow, avoiding acceptance by trying to change or control others.
Perhaps a lie may be justified in order to bring about a settlement. (This makes it possible for the ex-wife to challenge the child's sexual abuse, as the ex-wife's new wife divorces him and returns to her, or as she believed it could be quite complicated It is justified as penalty in their eyes. It is not surprising that many angry spouses make an oath, as you have seen that angry spouses are likely to kill other spouses. The family court 's judge thinks that he can not know the truth, because he believes that he is lying, there is little contradiction.
Projection
People with personality disorders are often familiar with the behavior of others while avoiding the inspection of their own actions, as active alcohol addiction and addiction blame others for their drug abuse . As a movie projector projects a large image from a hidden booth to the screen, people with personality disabilities usually project internal conflicts in daily interactions without knowing it. Every world is a stage involving a court.
In the family court declaration for persons with personality disorders it is not unusual to insist that the other party actually has their own characteristics ("he is an operative false attractive" or " She hides the information, process "), it does not fit for the partner. Spouse abusers argue that others are being abused. A liar insists that another person is lying (a man who knew that he was diagnosed as a self-loving personality disorder claimed that his wife also had an NPD just because he wanted to do shopping Was)
How the family court fits personality disorders
Family courts are perfectly suited for illusions of people with personality disabilities. There is an Almighty (Judge) who punishes or controls other spouses. The focus of the court process is recognized as firming the responsibility. And, many personality disorders are responsible experts. There is a side of an expert who defends their reason (their lawyers - or judges, if there is no lawyer).
It will be properly prepared by gathering statements from family, friends, experts. (It is automatic to seek children's loyalty and they are also considered either ally or enemies.) A simple recommendation does not stop this. Typically, people with personality disorders are highly skilled,.
People with personality disorders often have the strength to convince an experienced expert (counselor or lawyer) that what they say is true. Their charm, despair, and drive can reach a high level in the highly emotional bonding process with the pro. However, this intensity is a characteristic of personality disorder and is completely independent of the accuracy of their claim.
What can you do
Judges, lawyers, and family court counselors must undergo training for identification and treatment of personality disorders. In most cases, a continuous relationship of remediation is required - consultation with a counselor is desirable. However, since their belief system includes lifetime refusal and self-reflection avoidance, it is usually necessary to order this.
Family law Article 3190 (State of California) allows a court to request counseling up to one year for parents in the following cases: (1) between parents or between parents and their children Conflict,. [or] (2) Counseling is the best benefit for children. "I can help even short-term counseling.
In addition to being supportive, the therapist needs to help clients challenge their thoughts. On the accuracy of the opponent 's view and on their high expectation for the court. In addition, the therapist should not state clinical opinion or write statements on non-interviewed parties.
Likewise, attorneys must also challenge clients. We can not accept their declaration at par. You need to spend more time. The court should use the sanctions under Article 271 of the family law more effectively for parties and lawyers who refuse to unnecessarily increase negotiations on disputes and litigation costs.
The court must recognize that the parties are often not unequal. There may be personality disorders for one or both people, but it is not necessary to imply that they are both criminals (violent, operational, or liar). Subordinate spouses who do not violate may truly need court aid in dealing with criminals. The courts should not be neutralized by mutual arguments without looking deeply. Otherwise, due to personality style, the most angry parties can be matched by other truth arguments about neutral results, or by skillfully looking at the most skilled , Court approval.
The courts are in a unique position motivating necessary changes in personal behavior. In competitive cases, you need to tell counseling and results. Experts and stakeholders need to fully diagnose and treat the underlying problem of each person rather than allow parties (and their claimants) to be absorbed by an infinite hostile process . Their biggest problem is internal to the company, so it will never be settled by the court.
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